one "singh" to rule them all... one "room number" to find them ...one "wedding" to bring them all.. and in "alcoholic stupor" bind them...
(sorry JRR...)
what do you get when you add the following:
1. four friends
2. minus three wives
3. a big fat "bhaiyya" wedding
4. veg food
5. a classified ad for an escort service
6. a pack of condoms
7. a jaguar (not the animal..)
8. three Sikh pagdis
9. a very serious threat to burn down a 5 start resort..
10. a bus ride by biji, where someone supposedly "touched" him...
11. and a very miniscule amount of alcohol ?
answer: 42. (sorry douglas adams)
After all the wanton destruction at the previous 3 weddings (biji,mine,suny)... it was but natural to "take this to a whole new level"...
or in the words of the single most influential literary group, criticz, " to boldly go where no man has gone before"...(sorry Rodenberry)
our dehi soujourn... led us to many startling discoveries...chief among which were:
1. though uullaass, claimed hes from delhi...("hence hes not a bhaiyya")..there was no concrete proof until recently. when the "intrepid four"... (comprising of the fearless foursome reporters shok,biji,suny n myself)...accompanied by camera woman menu.... chanced upon the origin of the "Mishra" clan... strategically located at the gate of the famous "jantar mantar" in delhi...
in the words of Wikipedia..
"Mishra Yantra: The Mishra yantras were able to indicate when it was noon in various cities all over the world and was the only structure in the observatory not invented by Jai Singh II."
now its anybodys guess as to why the "misras" wanted to tell when it was noon in various cities all over the world... im guessing the wise king, jai singh, realised the stupidity of this project at the very outset.. and must have relegated it to the "Mishra" clan....
2. delhi runs on the 100 rs note..
at the wedding, all the "baraatis"...(members of the grooms family)...had to tie a traditional turban... obviously.. the four of us stood in line to get ours.. soon.. a couple of geriatrics badgered in.. and on account of our "tehzeeb"... we grudgingly obliged them.. and let them tie their turbans first...
20 mins and a whole cricket team later (im countin the playing 11.. reserves.. AND the water boy.. of ALL the teams in the IPL)...the line of these old timers who kept barging in...never seemed to stop! and to top it off.. a few of them kept slipping 100rs notes into the hands of the guy tying the turbans...
3. "yeh toh humari bachchi hai"...
the wedding fotographs... now theres a lovely indian tradition..where you stand in line.. to go up on stage...greet the newly weds and pose to take a snap with them... unfortunately, here too the wily "geriatric squad" barges in.. quoting the dialog of this para.. and skilfully elbow the "intrepid four" off the stage... I guess its now down to photoshop... to put the friends in the wedding album.
4. asking for veg pizzas.. can lead to a very graphic display of hairy and manly legs...
whats a "sangeet" without baccardi and non veg? the "intrepid foursome" decided to witness this gruesome scenario first hand..(ONLY for the reading pleasure of this blog)...
after many death defying starters and gut wrenching drinks....the lead investigator...suny... dared to ask a waiter for some veg pizzas..little did suny know that this particular waiter was a hidden spy of the "khandaani jain" gang. he immediately locked suny in an unbreakable "I love you" stare... and engaged him in a , man to man, barehanded, no holds barred, verbal and at times physical... display of his leg (he actually rolled up his trouser all the way upto his groin)... needless to say.. suny barely managed to escape with his pagdi intact.. as for his sexual orientation , further tests and results are awaited. we have nominated suny for the presidents bravery award.. for sacrificing his "future" for the sake of this investigative piece.
5. pagdi to the rescue...
this one is straight out of a Steven Spielberg production...a bunch of alien retards.. came asking for room rents... or else threatened to fry our brains...with a scifi device...that looked a lot like chillies and a lime.. coated in silver...(really? what were they thinking??)...we immediately donned our brain saving "pagdis"... and fought our way back to the airport...and left.. on a jet plane... (sorry Denver)
*PITA- pain in the ass
(sorry JRR...)
what do you get when you add the following:
1. four friends
2. minus three wives
3. a big fat "bhaiyya" wedding
4. veg food
5. a classified ad for an escort service
6. a pack of condoms
7. a jaguar (not the animal..)
8. three Sikh pagdis
9. a very serious threat to burn down a 5 start resort..
10. a bus ride by biji, where someone supposedly "touched" him...
11. and a very miniscule amount of alcohol ?
answer: 42. (sorry douglas adams)
After all the wanton destruction at the previous 3 weddings (biji,mine,suny)... it was but natural to "take this to a whole new level"...
or in the words of the single most influential literary group, criticz, " to boldly go where no man has gone before"...(sorry Rodenberry)
our dehi soujourn... led us to many startling discoveries...chief among which were:
1. though uullaass, claimed hes from delhi...("hence hes not a bhaiyya")..there was no concrete proof until recently. when the "intrepid four"... (comprising of the fearless foursome reporters shok,biji,suny n myself)...accompanied by camera woman menu.... chanced upon the origin of the "Mishra" clan... strategically located at the gate of the famous "jantar mantar" in delhi...
in the words of Wikipedia..
"Mishra Yantra: The Mishra yantras were able to indicate when it was noon in various cities all over the world and was the only structure in the observatory not invented by Jai Singh II."
now its anybodys guess as to why the "misras" wanted to tell when it was noon in various cities all over the world... im guessing the wise king, jai singh, realised the stupidity of this project at the very outset.. and must have relegated it to the "Mishra" clan....
2. delhi runs on the 100 rs note..
at the wedding, all the "baraatis"...(members of the grooms family)...had to tie a traditional turban... obviously.. the four of us stood in line to get ours.. soon.. a couple of geriatrics badgered in.. and on account of our "tehzeeb"... we grudgingly obliged them.. and let them tie their turbans first...
20 mins and a whole cricket team later (im countin the playing 11.. reserves.. AND the water boy.. of ALL the teams in the IPL)...the line of these old timers who kept barging in...never seemed to stop! and to top it off.. a few of them kept slipping 100rs notes into the hands of the guy tying the turbans...
3. "yeh toh humari bachchi hai"...
the wedding fotographs... now theres a lovely indian tradition..where you stand in line.. to go up on stage...greet the newly weds and pose to take a snap with them... unfortunately, here too the wily "geriatric squad" barges in.. quoting the dialog of this para.. and skilfully elbow the "intrepid four" off the stage... I guess its now down to photoshop... to put the friends in the wedding album.
4. asking for veg pizzas.. can lead to a very graphic display of hairy and manly legs...
whats a "sangeet" without baccardi and non veg? the "intrepid foursome" decided to witness this gruesome scenario first hand..(ONLY for the reading pleasure of this blog)...
after many death defying starters and gut wrenching drinks....the lead investigator...suny... dared to ask a waiter for some veg pizzas..little did suny know that this particular waiter was a hidden spy of the "khandaani jain" gang. he immediately locked suny in an unbreakable "I love you" stare... and engaged him in a , man to man, barehanded, no holds barred, verbal and at times physical... display of his leg (he actually rolled up his trouser all the way upto his groin)... needless to say.. suny barely managed to escape with his pagdi intact.. as for his sexual orientation , further tests and results are awaited. we have nominated suny for the presidents bravery award.. for sacrificing his "future" for the sake of this investigative piece.
5. pagdi to the rescue...
this one is straight out of a Steven Spielberg production...a bunch of alien retards.. came asking for room rents... or else threatened to fry our brains...with a scifi device...that looked a lot like chillies and a lime.. coated in silver...(really? what were they thinking??)...we immediately donned our brain saving "pagdis"... and fought our way back to the airport...and left.. on a jet plane... (sorry Denver)
*PITA- pain in the ass
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